Normalcy

It’s been a pretty awful week.

A has been cranky, work has basically been hell, and life in general has just been difficult. I’m exhausted and don’t feel well, but I can’t figure out what’s wrong. I’ve been in a funk since Noni passed away, so all of this has just been adding to my general bad mood.

And then the Boston bombings happened on Monday, too. (And then explosions in Texas yesterday. Good god. What is going on in this world?)

I haven’t written a post here about Boston, because honestly, it saddens me to my very core. I love that city. I had some of the greatest times of my life while I was there, I met amazing people, and I was able to get to know my family in a way that would not have been possible if I hadn’t lived there as an adult. If I had to pick anywhere else to live in this world, I would choose Boston.

So it’s unfathomable to me this could happen in such a great city on such a special day.

I hurt for my second home. I hurt for its amazing people. I hurt for everyone who was hurt or lost someone they love. I hurt for my friends and family still there. I hurt for myself and my daughter who will never get to know the Boston I knew.

Right now it just seems like everything sucks.

I want to get back to normal, but is there even such thing anymore? When is it acceptable to write about diapers, baby toys, and the infant feeding debate again? I don’t know, but now doesn’t feel like it.

I’m just…sad. And overwhelmed. For a lot of reasons. And that’s okay. Sometimes I forget it’s okay to feel what you feel no matter why you feel it, and I don’t need to make excuses for my emotions. So I’m just gonna be sad for a little while, and hopefully soon I’ll feel better.

I will be back to our regularly scheduled mama drama soon. Promise.

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