Hold me, love me, hold me, love me

Mom and Dad, you always said you hoped I had a baby just like me: Needy, fussy, and whiny. Well, your wish came true.

I’ve mentioned several times A does not like to be put down.


At all.

When we first came home with her, this wasn’t such a big deal. I had help and visitors the first couple weeks and didn’t notice it much. My maternity leave seemed never ending, and not something I had to worry about. But, now she’s five weeks, and I go back to work in a month, I’m starting to worry a little about her constant need to be in someone’s arms. It’s especially bad in the afternoons and evenings, when she is at her fussiest and literally the only thing that soothes her is being held and nursed.

I love to snuggle with my baby. While I wish I could be a little more productive during the day–I finally did the dishes today after about two weeks of staring at them; I received a Moby wrap from an old friend yesterday, and while I still need to master the basics of actually using it, it seems to work better for long term baby-wearing during the day. She’ll only tolerate being in her sling for short periods of time–I don’t mind holding her all day long. Especially since I know this time next month I won’t be able to anymore. However, I don’t expect our childcare providers will be as willing to hold her all the time (she’ll be watched by family the first month and then probably part-time daycare and part-time family after the new year).

Everyone in my life seems to be telling me I need to break this “habit”. Can newborns even have habits? It seems unnatural to me to let my baby just cry this young. Everything I’ve read says newborns can’t be spoiled or held too much, but everyone I know, it seems, wants to tell me the opposite. I do put her down when she’s napping or settled down, but as soon as she starts to whine, I pick her up again. I just can’t listen to her cry.

Someone tell me I’m not alone in this. I know I can’t hold her forever, so please tell me she’ll outgrow this phase. It breaks my hear to think she’ll be crying when I go back to work because she can’t be held 24/7. Mommies, help me out!

6 thoughts on “Hold me, love me, hold me, love me

  1. You’re not alone. She’s telling you what she needs. You’re listening. Perfect!
    She won’t cry 24/7 at childcare and family will be happy to hold her if she wants to. By January she’ll be interested in the other kids at daycare and used to the process.
    Keep snuggling your baby. You’re doing fine.

  2. I believe you have the baby your brothers wished on you. 😉

    But if it makes you feel any better, Button was/is the same way: happy in the morning, mood progresses downward as the day goes. She likes to be held more and more as the day goes. Now that she is moving around more, she is getting to where she doesn’t mind being put down on the floor or in her exersaucer as much. So hold away. Once mobility is achieved you will get less of it.

  3. Aww! Babies can’t be spoiled! Hold her as much as you want! Soon she’ll be wiggling out of your arms to go crawl/walk and play (charlotte is constantly on the go now lol!).  “Baby wearing” is so great for the baby and mom. I love my Ergo (I wish I’d gotten it sooner). I’ve heard of the wrap you have and that’s supposed to be great too. There are a lot of Facebook groups for support on how to wear it etc (ergo for example has a group).  We had a swing like you do and that also works amazingly! With growth spurts and their tiny bellies, it can feel like you are constantly nursing, but that will pass. And I’m sure she will do fine at daycare. They will have a lot of staff and not every baby needs to be held at the same time so they will have plenty of time for her. Btw we have a present for her!

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